During the time of my j-pouch surgeries one of my good friends was going through her first pregnancy. She was pregnant during the time leading up to my first surgery through my time with the ileostomy up until two months after my takedown. I never would have known all the similarities that pregnancy shares with j-pouch surgery if it were not for her.
The first similarity came early on even before my surgeries and through the time with my ileostomy. It was that we could eat whatever we wanted and did. Before my surgeries both my friend and myself were thin. We also both decided to take a cake class together. We would taste as much icing as we would make mistakes. I can only image what the other students were thinking. Two thin girls scarfing down icing like it was going out of style. After a few months it became obvious why my friend was eating so much, but not so much for me. But we continued to take tours of food places across the area to do our testing.
Next comes to the no lift zone. My friend was beginning to show though not much when I had my first surgery. Like all pregnant women she was put on a lifting weight limit. And like all people recovering from abdominal surgery I too was on a lift limit. My friend was a great source for me to get out and about during my recovery since I could not drive. One day we got the crazy idea to go to BJs Wholesale to pick up a couple of things for me. One of which was a case of water. The other of was either GasX, Beano, or Immodium; something small in a box. We were able to get the water on the flatbed (how I don't know) and proceeded to the checkout with my water and small box where the teenage checkout clerk asked why we didn't just carry the items. Lesson to anyone in the service industry, don't assume anything about your customers.
Another similarity that got stronger as time went on, me through my ileostomy then takedown and as my friend got bigger and bigger was we both had to go to the bathroom all the time. We were great shopping partners always needing a break at the same time. If one had to go the other would realize she would too. We just needed to go for different reasons. Going to the mall around Christmas season was never as interesting as it was then.
The final similarity is in the recovery. For those who haven't been through j-pouch surgeries and the takedown, the butthole area gets quite sore and painful to the point where it can be uncomfortable to sit. There is also a wound healing on the side of you stomach so moving around is difficult. Now I haven't given birth, but I can image what it would feel like to have a basketball be pushed through a straw, not to mention the tearing. After my friend had her baby and while I was still recovering from takedown neither of us could move around well and neither of us wanted to sit for too long. We were tired from not sleeping, uncomfortable, and feeling gross. I can't say we hung out much together at these times, but we did the best we could with what means we had.
So it turns out that having the j-pouch surgeries is like being pregnant. Even today there are similarities. We both have nights when we're up multiple times. There are times her baby or my belly gives us fits and at other times they bring us joy we were unable to imagine up until that point. Every day is a new day and we are continuing to learn how to deal with it all.
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