Summer is just on the horizon and plans are being made. This is the first year in the past 10 years I am making full on plans. For the past 10 years I hesitated to make any sort of plan. Even planning to go to the pool posed it's problems.
Two years ago my husband & I planned to go to the much anticipated Pavement reunion tour. Tickets were bought months in advance. Instead of rocking at a concert, I was spending day 2 of recovery from step 1 surgery in the hospital.
Last year plans were made for a weeks vacation at the shore. I was feeling good before the trip, but after about 2 days in pouchitis reared its head. By the time I got home I was in a full blown severe flare which almost landed me back in the hospital.
These were small plans compared to this year. It all starts this weekend with my first concert since New Year's Eve. It will be followed by numerous other concerts, trips to visit my parents at their home by the shore, picnics, and ending with a concert event followed by another week's vacation at the shore. Tickets are bought, hotels are paid for so there's no turning back.
I am hesitant to get excited for the summer. With so much to look forward to I am always waiting for the other shoe to drop. It's always been summers when my IBD has flared. I'm worried this year will be no different. I'm already not feeling well. Can this year be different? I'm holding out hope, and for once will be making plans like I am not a sick person. I can't keep sitting around scared to make commitments. Living that way for 10 years is long enough. So this year I am cautiously looking forward to the summer.
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